Thursday, January 29, 2009

Vantasy Isle Brain Bubble



It's misting lightly, I'm chilling out in an old record store in the Pacific Northwest, wearing a thick flannel shirt and a beard - listening to Nirvana (and I like to sings along, and I like to shoot my gun, but I don't know what it means.) When I was twelve, this was a dream of mine, but adolescent caucasians can't grow beards.

I recently remembered how beautiful this song is and want to share it with you.

NIRVANA - Jesus Doesn't Want Me For A Sunbeam

I'm not going to get sentimental, I swear, but I remember all the elements of where I was when Kurt Cobain blew his head off (wipes nose on sleeve, "Lithium" comes on, smiles, prepares to headbang). Sentiment is so early 2000's.


(so that's how they got that "Seattle" sound)

Teen1: Oh, here comes that cannonball guy. He's cool.
Teen2: Are you being sarcastic, dude?
Teen1: I don't even know anymore.

Here's the Breeder's "Cannonball" video. Maybe the best video ever, or like, you know, whatever.



One final thing, the link is fixed for the Nick Catchdubs and Mr. Ducker 90's mixtape. So seriously, go in, one of the best start to finish listens of 2008...and it has movie clips mixed in...

Nick Catchdubs and Mr. Ducker - Radio Friendly Unit Shifter

I'm gonna get back to living like this:



PS:

Apparently you can stream the entire Homerpalooza episode. We live in the future:





Ok, peace, I'm off to possibly book the London Symphony Orchestra.

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Space Cat Bajillionaire



Hey gang. How you doin? How's your Mama doin? How's your Papa doin? There's heavy dumps of journalism gathering out here at GI hq. The offices are getting an overhaul. Although we can't afford a secretary, the recession-proof budget has allowed for Opium scented incence, Chinese fieldworker hats and rubber ducks - the den vibe is strong and the piles of files are being filed in time.



Choices are being made about what documents to shred and which to keep. "Does this CD-R need it's cushy pocketed slip apartment, or should it live immortal as 320 Mp3's? (until the electro-magnetic pulse wipes out all the hard drives in a split second, cool it down, the globe still has that New Obama smell, does it make sense to dust off reminder of plausible collapse?)" These are the questions. It's a heady atmosphere, but the luddites on the cutting edge of something are learning the words to the new songs and making all the tackles in the backfield.



I had to pause the tooling to call your attention to a blog I forgot about, but that has been a pal through procrastination this morning. Cowboyz 'n" Poodles blue ribbon-outlaw-turned-Sherriff caliber online music journalism and original recipe first purse journalism.

Here's a sample:

I know this is very inconsequential ultimately but it hits a nerve: I have been obsessed with how Twilight's giant abstinence metaphor and the totally crazy-making sexual tension in the movie (where they don't even kiss until 3/4 of the way in) has a ridiculous hold on this country, and how I feel like, even though Obama won, the puritans may be winning this round of the culture wars. ABSTINENCE? NO CURSING? WHAT ELSE IS LEFT? PROHIBITION?




NICK LOWE & HIS COWBOY OUTFIT - (Hope To God) I'm Right



PS: From the youtube comments...

"KEITHDANIELS (2 years ago)
I can make a poodle within six seconds. (Not standard dog) I'm going to try to beat the world record in mid December 2006 "

PSS: I looked forever for the clip from Down By Law when Roberto Begnini is singing "I seeee by your haut-fit that you...are a cow-boy!" After I get my equipment set up, I'll be able to proivde such juice from my own files.

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Bart The Bear



Anyone who checks in here - even monthly - will be aware the The Simpsons is our favourite. The editorial staff of Grilling It (one dude) is in the post-post-post phase of quoting the program as a means of conversation, good taste shakedowns and freaking out fakes.

The collected episodes of The Simpsons are the finest work of art and entertainment ever produced by human beings. I will debate in defense of that statement any time, any where, before or after a belt of scotch (regardless of time), and my brifcase is not filled with shredded newspaper.

I've people who were born in the 1990's argue with me, that in their opinion South Park is better than The Simpsons. Kids start with drugs way too young these days. They'll grow up.

Speaking of growing up, the frozen in fourth grade Bartdude has been put on T-Shirts by Mishka, a company that make streetwear worth paying ridiculous prices for. The fail to winner ratio for "making streetwear worth the price" is about the same as "hilarious animated half-hour show for everyone."

You can read the full history of Bootleg Black Bart's evolution at the Mishka Bloglin.

Since I want you to finish this first, here's a few images as a teaser:











Bin Laden Weed is my favourite Three 6 Mafia song too! I have been marketed to! Next thing you know I'll be skateboarding with some cool kids dressed like Blossom.

The Slate's assessment of The Simpsons.

Damn.



Now I've gotta go dig up the bootleg Bart T-Shirt that I made in grade four.

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Precedent Barack Who's Sane Obama


"I will fight for your right to be weird-just as I know you will fight for mine.

We may be weird, Bubba, but we are not as weird as George Bush. He is like a dying yellow dog with broken teeth and slits for eyes and nothing else to say. The evil brute is finished. He will flap around on the hook for a while-just another leader of the free world turned into a mass of foul jelly...he long ago peddled the remains of his wretched ass to a band of God-spewing religious Nazis and stupid hate mongers..."


-Hunter Stockton Thompson, September 28th, 1992



Barack was measured, strong and finished with a building fire. Walking out to a live crowd of millions, he had the "I am ready to do the serious work now" look that he's been carrying since October. The whole world is pumped. The sky is still blue, but change is ineveitable. It will be comforting not to hate my neighbouring government on principle. I am sick of that neighbour's bush clippings landing on my driveway.

Politics is still a game of secrets and deception. Obama will be dealing with larger sums and costs of lives, knowledge, money and safety than we can fathom, but today - it feels like we have a momentary reprieve from the bullshit. Unless you're talking about Canadian politics.

SAM COOKE - A Change Is Gonna Come

T.I. - Big Shit Poppin (Do It)

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

BIG TUNE



If Tracy Chapman's "Baby Can I Hold You" wasn't awesome enough...



Enter Luciano Pavarotti, stage right. Playing the other side of the phone to Chapman's dormant volcano of longing, regret, and pragmatism of the heart. BOOMING.

Saturday, January 10, 2009

It's Warm Again



I could prattle on and on about the virtues of Phil Collins ability to put his ego aside, while investing so much of himself in his songs. But RRR in the (204) just took the bait and months of mobile phone service are riding on the second half of this American rules Football match. So, put the kids to bed...

Bateman, take over. (WARNING the youtube below eventually turns into soft pornography)

For The Wicked (Not For The Rest)



I'm in a sweatsuit watching sports and placing high-stakes-friendship-on-the-line-bets/threats from secure telephone uplinks. Here's a tune that got me through a commercial break.

CUTTY RANKS - Dutty Six Pack

"I love those little green monsters, but they're all over my room"
-The Wiz

Too Soon?



Hit refresh:

Wednesday, January 07, 2009

Best of 2000 &...Later



2008 top 10 coming soon. The holiday is over now. Who want's to read a top 10 list by someone who has it compiled in September? I can't even think about last year until this year. By definition. Until a week ago, last year WAS this year.

Enjoy The New Yorker's most popular photos of 2008.

They are laugh-out-loud-wryly-on-the-inside funny.



I know a bookmark is asking too much, sweet reader, but try to remember that you were here. Next time, we'll have some music.

Sunday, January 04, 2009

Friday, December 19, 2008

Gulp



What with Frost Nixon mania sweeping the globe, this is called for.

Mark Felt aka Deep Throat has died. Here's the article I wrote for Kimono.ca (also, RIP) upon his emergence from anonimity in June 2005 (in June 2005, when stacking double entendres until they tip over was my idea of "comic genius").



Deep Throat Swallows Pride, Spits Out Identity

By Cookie Blankman
Washington Correspondent

The glistening truth behind the identity of Nixon squealer "Deep Throat" splattered against the faces of a nation this week, as mouths hung agape; waiting for more. As a top-level member of the FBI brass, W. Mark Felt; couldn't resist his righteous snitching as Nixon peeked under the paper of freedom's Christmas presents. Felt's emergence proves that any other claims to Deep Throathood are spoofs.

As quickly as Deep Throat had once again come into the headlines, with a gulp, we closed our eyes, and he was gone. A spokesperson for JISM, The Journal of Incognito Snitches Monthly, reported that although Deep Throat has now been wiped away from the realm of mystery, he has left a crust on our culture and a bad taste in the mouths of corrupt, paranoid, mean-spirited heads of state everywhere. He stated: " you see men and see women everyday all with secrets, the amazing thing about Deep Throat is that it took little stroking before he sucked a presidential office into the tube of truth."

A salty, white, opaque old man, Felt liberally discharged this information, ending a decade old mystery. He needed to let the years fluff by so that he could stand erect and burst with joy that he was the seed that fertilized the egg of the Watergate investigation that hatched with an impeached Nixon.

Autobiographical documentary fans can gobble up Mr. Felt's eponymous film at a variety of Internet web sites.



Here's the saucy video for Claude VonStroke's song "Deep Throat"



While we're in danceland...here's the perfect stocking stuffer for the party animal on your holiday gift designation (no Xmas-o) list.

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Like Your Car Or Cow, If You Have One (don't)



I'm home safe at the lodge after a victorious Eastern expedition (report to come).

Currently being snowed in.

Fireplaces to stoke, wings baking...

We'll talk.

Friday, December 05, 2008

Neiling

I saw Neil Young & Wilco tonight. The things I said most often were "Holy fuck," "HUGE!" (also) "Wow!"



PS:

Wilco kicked it off with an "easy rockers" set, heavy on new material. Exactly what Neil used to do, way back in the 95-2007 era.

I wanted it to sound like this, but it didn't.

Tuesday, December 02, 2008

Big Smoke*




I'm on my way to Tahranna for a bit. I hear they have computers there, so this blog should still be cool.

Big Smoker friends of Grilling It, we will drink, make stuff, eat mexican, laugh, filmgo, wear coats, be pretty/handsome, merrymake, chill the "f" out and yes...gossip:



This represents my attitude, as I pack gifts and wrap bowls.

DONALD FAGEN - New Frontier



*Not to be confused with "Big Tobacco"

Monday, December 01, 2008

Friday, November 28, 2008

Cat Specific Web Humour (Rap Related) (LULZ Guaranteed)



The curmudgeon of cool TwentyTwenty dumped this on the rug of the interestnet, so I thought I'd post it here, cause shits needs homes in the neu economy, not to mention winter.





Here is the marginally less funny original.





Images courtesy of Garfield minus Garfield, a website:

"a site dedicated to removing Garfield from the Garfield comic strips in order to reveal the existential angst of a certain young Mr. Jon Arbuckle. It is a journey deep into the mind of an isolated young everyman as he fights a losing battle against loneliness and depression in a quiet American suburb. "


I'd get to that faster than Garfield finds lasagna...nope...not funny...my wife thought that was gangbusters.

See you later. I need a break from the screen.



Thursday, November 20, 2008

After All It's On The Wall



"Spraypaint" A poem by Rob Giampietro.


Courtesy of longtime ponderer (and sometime podna)in rhyme THE WIZ



He omits the map of Canada, but does Prince ever smear the emotion of a lonely painter on his version of a Joni Mitchell masterpiece.

PRINCE - A Case Of You



While we're on paint. Viddy yourself a copy of this movie:





PEACE!


Friday, November 14, 2008

BLOCKED!!!



BREAKING NEWS:

Lego has lost the patent to make the product that we know to be Lego.


Here are my favourite things ever made with Lego.





Abyssinians - Leggo Beast


King of the Trees (the treemeister)



I had to take a break from video/radio/scribblatory sword sharpening to post this video of a Dan Deacon "song." If you're not into a gruff lizard who tells it like it is, living in a universe of illustrated dictation, well, the new Bond is out, you could watch the trailer AGAIN.

If you are in need of some LOL-ing 2 day while u werk or what F-R...



Also, here's the sweetest little toon that I've heard in a cute minute. It happened to have the same name as the Dan Deacon video (thanks for helping with future romance mixtapes Youtube search!)



The band is HELLO SUNSHINE, and the singer Joy Bishop is like Natalie Portman crossed with all the beautiful girls in class that you never asked out for drinks, despite resolving to do so on your way to the car, every single class.